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Today's Show Sunday March 1, 2015

Sunday March 1, 2015

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Transcript I'm Isabella Rossini and you've reached Naked News Magazine! I hope you're ready to rock, because we're kic... Read More >> Hide >>

I'm Isabella Rossini and you've reached Naked News Magazine! I hope you're ready to rock, because we're kicking things off with an ALL ACCESS edition of Turn It Up! Today Carli Bei's chatting with the guys from Skrou - a hard rock band that's all about hot girls and fast cars. You know, the way rock 'n roll should be! Here they are!

I'm Peyton Priestly, with this week's ODDS N ENDS

Talk about going LONG! A Michigan woman has agreed to pay 3200 dollars in damages for burning a hundred-yard penis onto a high school football field! The unnamed woman pleaded guilty to the charge of malicious destruction of property, which took place at the Bedford Community Stadium field last August. By agreeing to pay up she avoided some OTHER serious charges. What a dick!

A 49-year old woman was busted for theft at a Florida WalMart. Employees spotted her guzzling a can of Red Bull and scarfing down a handful of RAWHIDE DOG TREATS. Shawn Michelle Warden opened the bag of doggy snacks, stuffed some in her mouth, and put another handful in her purse for later. She was stopped at the checkout counter on her way out of the store, charged with petty theft, and hopefully spanked with a rolled-up newspaper. Bad doggy!

And a 24-year old British woman is hoping to give birth to the first Martian! Maggie Lieu is a finalist for the Mars One Project, and hopes to become the first person to give birth on the Red Planet! The Mars One Project is dedicated to setting up a permanent colony on the neighboring planet in 2024. If she makes the cut, Ms. Lieu is dedicated to helping populate Mars, and would pick the father out of the group of 23 others who will be making the trip. Strange, but true. We'll be right back.

Okay, up next Eila Adams in an all new edition of Viewers Mail. She gathered up all the anchors, including myself and a couple of special guests, to talk about our audition experience.

I'm Natasha Olenski and THIS is what went viral in the NAKED NEWS VIDEO BLOG!

We've all snuck a beer or two into the stadium right? But wait until you see how much this soccer fan in TURKEY, thought he could sneak in. Try and keep count, if you can!
Believe it or not that was 24 beers in all! Pretty ballsy move - STUPID, but ballsy!

Those of you living near the eastern seaboard know this winter has been one of the worst EVER. But no matter how bad it's been where you are, I can almost guarantee you haven't had as much snow as the people in New Brunswick Canada. After seeing THAT, I will NEVER complain about the weather again!

Bad drivers are everywhere, but this 92-year old Wisconsin man might be the worst I've ever seen! Watch him wreak havoc in this grocery store parking lot!
When police finally caught up to him, the driver told them that his foot got "stuck on the accelerator". He smashed 9 cars in all, but thankfully no one was hurt!

That guy could definitely use a few driving lessons from the lady in our next clip! To promote the 2015 Mustang, Ford hired a cute blonde stunt driver to attend a speed dating session, and take a few guys out for a wild "1st date" they won't soon forget. Gorgeous AND a total boss behind the wheel! THAT my friends, is the total package!

We're going from sexy stunt drivers to sexy athletes. California's Allison Stokke is, by far, the world's most attractive pole vaulter, and she teamed up with GoPro recently to put together this awesome video.

I'll never look at pole vaulting the same, thanks Allison! That's all for THIS edition of the Naked News Video Blog, see you next time.

If you KNEW that employees at a restaurant weren't washing their hands, would you eat there? Of course not. But evidently it wouldn't stop Republican North Carolina Senator Thom Tillis. He's arguing that restaurants should be able to "opt out" of health regulations that demand employees wash their hands after using the bathroom. He thinks eating establishments are being OVER regulated. Maybe so, but remind me to NEVER eat at his house.

A Venezuelan comic book fan took his love for the Captain America series a smidge TOO far. 37-year old Henry Damon underwent EXTENSIVE plastic surgery to look just like the superhero's arch rival, Red Skull. As you can see, he's had implants placed in his forehead and had the front of his nose chopped off to look like the infamous bad guy. Up next he'll be getting silicone implants on his cheekbones, chin, and cheeks, and after that his face will be dyed red to really pull the look together.

And after a frantic search and a public plea for help, Miami police have recovered a box of ammunition that fell out of a military helicopter! The metallic ammo box fell out of a Black Hawk chopper during overnight drills. It eventually turned up in the Miami-Dade area. Despite the embarrassing goof, the military said it plans to continue doing exercises over the city, so if you live in Miami I suggest wearing a helmet at all times! With your Odds 'n Ends, I'm Peyton Priestly!

Thanks Peyton. Our last feature today comes to us courtesy of one Katherine Curtis. Our resident nerd and gaming enthusiast has not one, not TWO, but THREE hot new titles, RIGHT NOW, in the Game Spot!

Thanks Isabella. Let's take a look at Starwhal for multiple platforms. It's a multiplayer party game that's had a LOT of success on Steam - and now it's hoping to make a splash on console. Starwhal isn't your typical multiplayer game. You control a narwhal – you know, one of those whales with the big unicorn tusk thingy – and duke it out against other narwhals... in space. Yup, you heard that right- space narwhals. The graphics are retro-cool and there are a bunch of fun challenge modes and achievements to unlock. You can even customize your narwhal with over nine THOUSAND costume combos. Starwhal is pretty epic and gets four out of five Naked Ns.

Our next game is Rugby 15, also for multiple platforms. It's been a long, LONG time since a decent rugby game was made – and unfortunately for rugby union fans, you'll have to keep waiting. The flaws in Rugby 15 are pretty apparent. For starters, the gameplay totally revolves around what your player is doing. The AI only kicks in once something happens – otherwise there's a lot of standing around that would almost NEVER happen in real rugby. There aren't enough penalties called and it's WAY too easy to force a turnover. Also, tackles and sidesteps seem to occur completely at random – it's more like rugby roulette than anything else. Throw in some less than spectacular visuals and it's pretty clear Rugby 15 fails to reach the TRY line. I'll give it two out of five Naked Ns.

And last up we have Isbarah – The First Journey, for PC and Mac. It's a cross between a platformer and a “bullet hell” shoot em up. Each level is a boss fight – so if you're a fan of games like Ikaruga – then Isbarah will definitely appeal to you. Along with your standard platformer game controls, there are three extra abilities: slow motion, dash and the barrier, which can act as a shield or an extra platform. Running and dodging is key to surviving. This game is really, REALLY hard. If you're up for a challenge, give Isbarah – The First Journey a try – it's only 15 bucks on Steam. I'll give it three out of five Naked Ns. For the Game Spot, I'm Katherine Curtis.

And that will do it for THIS EDITION of Naked News. We'd like to thank you for tuning in and while we're gone, encourage you to stay in touch. You can do that any number of ways including by e-mail, to feedback@nakednews.com OR on social media. We're on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Just go to NakedNews.com to get connected. We'll leave you now with our weekly look behind the scenes. Take care everyone.

Some clips and outtakes that didn't make the regular show, including a very entertaining rant by Angie Heyward, some booty-slapping by Eila Adams, a little more with Carli Bei and Skrou.

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